One of the worst sentences in the English language has got to be, “I think we should be friends.” Only in a world as weird and crazy as ours do we think that we should have a platonic relationship with those hot girlswe’ve dated after we’ve stopped boning them. I’m sure most people are not keen on this, and so is this poor soul:

“This guy I’ve been dating for three months just broke up with me recently because he said he has ‘no feelings’ for me. However, he still wants to stay friends, saying he wants us to be ‘close friends,’ in case ‘something might happen.’ Is he bullshitting me? Should I be friends with him just so I could keep him in my life, knowing I will always want more out of it? I do want him as a friend, but I’m awfully attracted to him and I fear I’ll get hurt. My feelings are already hurt because he broke up with me.”

The questions you have to ask is, were you friends before you started dating? No? Well then, goodbye. Thank you for the sex and the heartbreak. Please lose my number on your way out. P.S.: Your jokes weren’t even funny.

This is a classic case of a guy wanting to have his cake and eat it too. He knows you’re a good catch, but his heart is not into you as of the moment, so he would like to keep you around in case his future endeavors with other hot girls don’t work out, or he just needs a shoulder to cry on. Sounds like a fairy tale romance, yes?

And he knows you’re into him bad, or else he would never do this to you. I’ll give him extra points for pulling that ballsy “something might happen” line, and another plus for being manipulative.

Yes, he probably means he wants to be friends with you, but what’s in it for you? What will you get out of it? You get to harbor this attraction for months, or even years. You will be frustrated, jealous and ultimately be hurt.

It’s still all going be up to you, but his offer of friendship will not benefit you in any way, and will be very far from ideal. Don’t torture yourself save yourself from the hurt and protect your ego. Just say goodbye and move on with your life.

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